Tales from The Trenches Archive

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But what if they stab me?

I put in my time as a game store employee. I won’t say exactly which store it was, but suffice to say that they sold “games”, thus one might “stop” there. I was young, impressionable, and drawn in with the promise of all the games I could ever play.

Like any retail job, the holidays were hell. I had a woman throw not one, not five, but seven PSP games at me simultaneously. At one point I was so sick that I stood by the door handing out flyers with one hand and taking swigs of Dayquil with the other.

But the worst part? Corporate created a new policy. It was as follows:

When the line at your register gets exceptionally long, make eye contact with the person in the very last place and ask them “Are you having fun yet?”.

Not only was it moronic, embarrassing, and insulting to the customer, but corporate sent out secret shoppers to make sure the policy was enforced. On top of all that, we worked in a less than savory part of town, and I was pretty sure several times that I was just going to be outright shanked on the sales floor.

Gotta love retail.